You've probably heard the phrase "what's in it for me."
WIIFM. It's one of the first things you learn in sales. Always think about what the other person wants. Present things in a way that matters to them.
It's good advice. But I think most people get it backwards.
They use it as a tactic. A way to frame their pitch. A strategy to get the yes.
That's not what I'm talking about.
I'm talking about actually caring what's in it for them. Not as a technique. As a posture. Genuinely wanting to help the person in front of you get what they need.
Zig Ziglar said it better than anyone: If you help enough people get what they want, you'll get what you want.
But here's the part most people skip. It has to be authentic. You really have to want to help. If it's a play, people feel it. If it's real, people feel that too.
The paradox
Things are moving fast right now. More pressure. More noise. More to do.
And when the pressure rises, here's what happens. You go inward. You focus on yourself. Your pipeline. Your goals. Your stress. That's survival mode.
But the paradox is that the fastest way out of survival mode is to turn outward. Toward the person in front of you. Toward service.
The more pressure you feel, the more important it is to slow down and be useful to someone else. Not because it's a nice thing to do. Because it actually works.
How
It starts with listening. Real listening. Not waiting for your turn to talk.
Next time you want to speak up in a conversation, try one of these instead:
Ask an open-ended question.
Say "tell me more."
Or my new favorite: "What's up with that?"
That's it. Just keep the other person talking. Stay curious. Be present. Don't make it transactional.
This is easier said than done. I know. It takes practice. Not perfection. Just the willingness to show up as someone who wants to move the needle, even a little.
What I believe
I'm more bullish on this than I've ever been.
Humans connect at the heart level way more than the head level. The strategy matters. The skills matter. But the connection is what makes it all work.
So this week, slow down. Turn toward the person in front of you. Not with an agenda. Not with a pitch. Just with curiosity.
Be with them. Actually, be with them.
That's where the good stuff happens.
Until next week,
Jon